Not Guilty by Association

For my son’s high school senior retreat, we were asked to write him letters that he could open during a period of reflection and meditation. The theme was “Where do you come from?” We were encouraged to tell stories about grandparents, great-grandparents, etc. My throat tightened in an all too familiar feeling. My German great-grandfather…

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Falling

“I’m dying. I don’t know how to do this!” Laying on the bed in the dark, these words played over and over in my mind. I had felt a little off for some time, but there was nothing I could put my finger on. My family urged me to go to the doctor, but what…

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No End in Sight

Weeks before the collective pandemic upheaval in March 2020, I found myself stepping off the Seattle-to-Bainbridge Island ferry. I am carrying a backpack chock-full of books. Some of the books are mine; others are not. Books are friends, holding words I want to remember. Piles of them are stacked in both my home and therapy…

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A New Way Forward

“Where do your boys think you are right now?” my counselor asks.  I am surprised by her question, which seems out of left field. “I told them I had an appointment,” I reply. It’s vague, I’ll admit, but it’s not a lie. “What would happen if you told them the truth?” she asks, interrupting the…

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Tipping Point

The computer keyboard looked alive, warped and waving as my eyes roamed over the keys. They were everywhere. Ants crawling in and out of the space between the letters and numbers, piling over each other to get to…Where were they going? Wait, where were they coming from? I searched frantically around the desk, my heart…

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The Scarlet Woman

*The following is posted in honor of National Slavery and Human Trafficking Prevention Month. This post includes words that may be triggering for some trauma survivors. What comes to your mind when you see a woman standing on a corner alone, under the glow of a street lamp?  Close your eyes for a moment. 

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I am a 5-star general.

I haven’t been deployed to another country for battle but have been in my own combat zone. I’ve had to run, hide and plan ingenious strategies to survive.  I was not trained for this war. I was thrust into it and like a savage I had to build my own artillery.

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The Woodlands Fairy Child

*This piece was written in the beginning of April. Much has happened in our world since then and the author wishes you to know that her heart is angered by the flagrant injustices—both past and present— suffered by people of color. She grew-up in a family insensitive to the current suffering, and as an adult has…

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A Fairytale In Ruins

“We tell ourselves lies to bear the truth.”  Dr. Dan Allender “Daughter of Eve from the far land of Spare Oom where eternal summer reigns around the bright city of War Drobe, how would it be if you came and had tea with me?” The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis  …

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Playing With Tears

*The following post is from a sexual abuse survivor and may contain elements that could feel triggering. It has been three years.  My body feels heavy, my pulse throbs in my neck. The memory, so violent and traumatic. My mind has begun to recover but my body has been slower to follow. During an EMDR…

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