Red Tent Living

The Hem

By: redtentwomen November 21, 2019November 21, 2019

Day to Day, FaithHealing, Megan Anderson, mental health system, Psychiatric Ward, Recovery from Abuse, Suicidal Ideation, Therapy3 Comments

I glanced down at my arms; the three slashes seeped blood. The large amount of aspirin I consumed thinned and accelerated its departure. I wanted to escape and run. Another locked psychiatric ward would be my fate. Only my physical screams could be heard, but these lashes were the deep wails of my internal world.…

Body Meets Soul

By: redtentwomen November 20, 2019November 17, 2019

Day to Day, Faith, FemininityBody image, Developing Self Compassion, Learning Kindness, Self Compassion, self image, Shame, Shannon Brink7 Comments

She stares back at me in the mirror. The dark hollowed eyes, the rounded face, the heavy thighs, the slumped over posture. I know the contours of her well. I despise her most of the time. She doesn’t look like I think she ought to, and she knows it. I tell her all the…

Lies That Invade

By: redtentwomen November 19, 2019November 18, 2019

Day to Day, FaithCommunity, Evil, Insecurity, Lies we Believe, Mallory Redmond, Shame6 Comments

I walked in the door from work and immediately sent a text to my husband: “I received my demotion today.” The big sigh at the end of the sentence was, I assumed, implied. His response was kind but unsurprised: “And how do you feel about that?” Terrible! Horrible! Just really, really awful! I opted for…

The Courage Of Being Swept Up In A Love Song

By: redtentwomen November 18, 2019November 17, 2019

Day to Day, Faith, FemininityAnniversary, Counseling, Marriage, Nicole Clifton, Romance, Sex, Vaginismus2 Comments

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. (Lao Tzu) For anyone who has ever been in a long-term relationship, you know that love changes over time. My husband and I are college sweethearts and have been married for eight years. I never anticipated getting married so young,…

Six Months to Live

By: redtentwomen November 15, 2019November 14, 2019

Day to Day, FaithAimee S, Difficult Diagnosis, Medical Residency4 Comments

It was my first year of medical residency. My brain was stuffed with all of the technical information to wear the doctor’s white coat; however, I lacked the knowledge born of experience. And I knew it. He was a patient, kind man, somewhere in his 50s. His skin was yellowed with jaundice; his belly swollen…

The Art of Being Fine

By: redtentwomen November 14, 2019November 10, 2019

Day to Day, Faith, FemininityBreast Cancer, Jill English14 Comments

Making Room for the Villain The radiologist pointed, “Right there, see the dark spot? I don’t like what I’m seeing.” There it was, right of center on the screen, nestled in bright white digital breast tissue on the screen. The spot was dark and sinister, like a burn hole on a white couch. Its’ edges…

Small Victories

By: redtentwomen November 13, 2019November 13, 2019

Day to Day, FaithAging, Cycling, Life After A Stroke, Pat Sloan, Staying Young, Stroke Recovery4 Comments

There are several boundaries and battle grounds that my mind does not cooperate with on command as it once did!! Information “plays hide and seek” in my brain, and is not controlled solely by my will – the result of a stroke in my brain. Some “pieces” are just gone, some occasionally re-appear, some are definitely…

Spared

By: redtentwomen November 12, 2019November 12, 2019

Day to Day, Faith, FemininityBreast Cancer, Faith, Kelly Winkler, Mammography5 Comments

Under fluorescent lights, my doctor gently massages my breast tissue as I lie on a metal cot. Two months ago, I started having pain in my breasts. I put it off, thinking it was due to holding plank postures in my new cardio-yoga routine. “But you need to get a mammogram,” my mother urged. “You…

My Monster

By: redtentwomen November 11, 2019November 10, 2019

Day to Day, Faith, FemininityCounseling, Crisis HotLine, depression, Mal Arnold, Recovery, Self Injury, Suicidal Ideation, The Trevor Project, To Write Love On Her Arms3 Comments

For many years, I believed the lie that the only way of coping with the parasitic fears and deep pain in my life was to bring injury to my body. I still remember the young teenage girl standing in front of a dressing room mirror, fighting back tears and thinking this was her only option.…

My Dad Is Peter Pan

By: redtentwomen November 8, 2019November 7, 2019

Day to Day, Monthly Themes, relationshipsPoetry5 Comments

Playing life is not fun With a shadow for a father. The only time I see the real form Is when he weeps Or verbally punches me Or rages And sometimes when he is having non-manipulating fun.