cultivating the beautiful ordinary by sharing our tales and our tables
My mother hated my first book. Shortly after it was published, her sister asked to meet with me, and observed that the woman who wrote it was very angry. I believe my aunt was quite surprised when I agreed with her. I remember the morning well.
Read More
Complex grief is the terminology I’d use to describe my 2023. That year I was in a bad car accident, my ovarian cysts caused me to bleed for three months, my mother was diagnosed with stage four cancer and passed away within six months, I was sexually assaulted at a spa, my two-year relationship ended,…
Read More
Everyone envisions a family. For some it is a picket fence, three kids, and a collie. My vision was a rowdy tribe, living one wild adventure after another.
Read More
My favorite piece of jewelry is a gold necklace—a dainty chain and a small gold disc that resembles a British pound coin. The outer edge of the pendant has a tiny scalloped edge circling the round shape, which gives it a unique beauty. On one side the word Hope is engraved, and on the other,…
Read More
On a rainy mid-pandemic Sunday afternoon the call came. A mutual Virginia friend uttered the words, “I heard about Charlotte. I know you were dear friends. I’m so sorry.” A driver high on meth had crossed the double yellow lines, hitting her head-on as she drove into town to sing for a virtual church service.…
Read More
The beginning of Mom’s cancer journey turned my world upside down. The weekend after her abnormal scan brought all of the siblings together, several from out of town. Every weekend following felt like a holiday in those early days, when hopes were high that the right smoothie, sauna, or supplement would change the game and…
Read More
As the “local daughter,” once Mom’s diagnosis of metastatic pancreatic cancer was confirmed, I toggled between showing up and removing myself from the space as much as possible so that her other children could get what they wanted and needed from her dying process. Out-of-town siblings and their families visited often. Mom’s sisters and brother…
Read More
Recently, we attended parties celebrating milestones achieved by dear friends. One will attend Christian college after graduating high school; one begins a first job after competing as a student-athlete for another Christian school. Posted on our refrigerator, the invitations were reminders—not just of party dates, but also of pain we are navigating as parents. …
Read More
Decades ago, I went grocery shopping after the funeral of a dear friend who had died much too young and way too swiftly. His tragic death left one of my closest friends without a partner and their young children without a father. Arriving home after the funeral, I was anxious, emotionally untethered, and in need…
Read More
I put it off for as long as I possibly could—the slimming down and organization of our fourth bedroom. We established it as the playroom when we moved in with our little girls six years ago, but I was finally accepting that, at ages 15 and 12, they were doing far less playing than ever…
Read More