The Trash Run

My surprised skin bumped into the chills of the new fall morning air. Inhaling deeply from its fresh coolness, I steadied my beating heart’s morning aches that were left over from last night’s racing internal discussion about a life and a death. A young 19-year-old woman hung, suspended before my mind with her long, coarse,…

Read More

Accepting Help

The first time I travelled through Minnesota on my way to Winnipeg, I realized how much more comfortable I am in urban areas. The further west I drove, the more anxious I became, as traffic thinned out and pick-up trucks outnumbered cars. I hadn’t know this about myself, but I quickly realized that I had…

Read More

Traveling Through

I used to hop in a car and agree to go anywhere. Long dusty road trips or short last-minute excursions—I was game for either. Armed with Slim Jims, Oatmeal Creme Pies, and gas station coffee, we grabbed our play lists and went wherever we wanted. From the outside looking in, it was a compulsive exercise…

Read More

Fruit Cocktail

As a child, a dark closet was the safest ground to play with my dolls.  My mother was not a cruel woman, but she didn’t play, nor did she give room for anything other than work.  She grew up in the aftermath of the Great Depression with a mother who gave two of her children…

Read More

A Legacy of Love

It has been over five years since I wrote about my beach glass collection. Actually it was the topic of one of my first entries for Red Tent Living. I posted an impressive picture of that collection that is repeated here for your enjoyment. My beach glass is no longer clustered together as in the…

Read More

To My Elders

Four years ago, on a wintery morning, a fierce, truth-telling woman whom I cherish as my elder told me something I have never forgotten: “You can’t know where this story leads. All you can do is look at this moment and do the next right thing.” At the time, we were speaking of a romantic…

Read More

Returning To My Rested Self

You would think apple picking is about the smell, but it’s not. At first, it’s about the feel. The air is always colder than you think out in the orchards. Even with a stocking cap pulled down past my ears and a cozy green flannel zipped up to my neck, a shiver occasionally runs the…

Read More

Where I’m Supposed To Be

I am at an advantage. In general, those aren’t difficult words for me to process. I know that I’m advantaged in so many areas in my life. I have an incredible husband, supportive family, and sensational friends. I have a steady job that gives me opportunities to do things I love. I get to live…

Read More

Freedom

Folsom Prison Blues “Well if they freed me from this prison If that railroad train was mine I bet I’d move it on a little farther down the line…” Johnny Cash   Our daughter is back. After eighteen years of being away, of staying away, of hiding the truth of her messy life. We are…

Read More

Empty Spaces

I whispered, “I am not my burnout,” a phrase I held underneath my breath just silent enough so no one else could hear. These words erupted as Jen Hatmaker was giving a stellar keynote at the recent Brave On conference. While I do not recall Jen’s exact words, I sharply remember her speech triggered a new…

Read More