The Mystery I Live

Our scars travel with us through life. Not just our own scars, but scars of our friends and family become the fabric of who we are. I remember my first experience of losing a friend to death. A group of us had traveled by train to Fred Waring’s choral workshop in Pennsylvania. While there we…

Read More

October: Mystery

For the month of October the women of Red Tent Living will be considering the theme “Mystery” (starry skies, the deep, divine presence, question). Join us by reading the essays or by hosting your own Red Tent Dinner and sharing stories with women gathered at your table.  

Read More

Unexpected Surrender

I grabbed my purse and keys and called out, “I’m going to run and grab the pizza, be back in fifteen minutes.” My son dropped his game controller and followed me towards the door, “Hey, I want to ride along Mom.” The next fifteen minutes included a conversation which altered the trajectory of our life…

Read More

Her Hair Tells A Story

Standing in the bathroom, a place of horrific and shameful abuse.  I am getting another haircut that strips away my femininity.  I’m 11 years old and in the midst of a war that revolves around my hair length.  Much of my childhood has already been stolen. My inner little girl is screaming “Please mom, stop! Don’t…

Read More

Rupture. Release. Beauty

I’m getting divorced. Three simple words.  Three simple words that don’t convey the pain and messiness of this season.  Three simple words that don’t feel real.  Three simple words that represent an impossibly complicated emotional state of being.

Read More

Resiliency

One of the sessions I attended at a recent conference was about resilience and optimism. The presenter said it was once believed that resilience was an inherited quality, but we now know that resiliency skills can be taught. As she spoke, different life events came to mind, some I had not thought of for many…

Read More

Debridement

She’s giggling, running, faster and faster, So fast that chubby legs cannot keep up with internal thrill But she tries valiantly…and goes down. I’m watching, delighting in her delight Yet simultaneously cognizant of the great risk of physical abandon and asphalt to her toddler body. Gravity–real life–fulfills what I had hoped against. Bright pink shorts…

Read More

Messy But Beautiful

When my husband told me that our sixteen year old had come out to him as transgender, I laughed. I thought it was some weird joke I didn’t understand. John may as well have said Sam was on a spaceship headed toward Jupiter. I was shocked and confused; it made no sense to me. “Bring…

Read More

Awards Day

The hand of a distinguished celebrity judge moves through the air in slow motion. The contestant’s eyes widen and mouth drops open in disbelief, in hope. Contact is made with a large round button, rocketing golden confetti up. It gently rains back down in real time, showering the chosen one in worth and honor. Often…

Read More