I Am From

I am from my own imagination

From ground scorched with misdirected rage

I am from forced silence

From underwater screams stuck
my throat

I am from
her dark hallow

a lifetime
of aching belly

I am from
both body
and mind
filled with
too many scoops of Mama

I am from familial pain seething simmering

From pain erupting upon cold shoulders turned backs

I am from
forming me
finding me
through clenched teeth

I am from
scoops of each ancestral womb-barer in my line of
sleeping divinity

I am from
desert wanderers blood-pulsing secrets heartbeats pulsing

I am from scoops of shame confusion envy

I am from love-starved thick-thighed women

I am from
fed on regret
forced down with scarcity

Women declaring themselves too much
not enough

I am from assembled pieces collected

gathering clues dropped by other girls other women

I am from
my own beautiful abyss

I am from void

I am not
the tamed scarecrow of a girl they desired
me to be

I am from
strings clipped free

I am from
through gripping puppet-master hands

I am from erased identity

soul’s loom weaving
truest pieces leaving lies
the thrashing floor

I am from ocean basalt

I am from mountain orogeny

I am from
curvy fern moss

I am from sun fusion

I am from
moon exosphere

I am from aether and alchemy

I am from my own wild imagination

Holly Lowmiller is a rainbow in a world of neutrals. A lover of tacos, rainbows, and massive amounts of coffee. Holly digs naps and cuddling with her people and pets, which include six brilliant children, cats, and more cats. Mourning with those who mourn and rejoicing with those who rejoice is one of Holly’s greatest passions. As a fierce lover of nature, she uses her work as a Forest Therapy guide to aid in her own healing journey as well as offering the healing power of creation to others in her community.